Skeptic Spirit

This post is harsh, and it comes with a warning. Do NOT read further, if you are insecure and seeking confirmation about whether or not you are an empath!

It is not offered as a help to anyone. It is my theory about the dangers of calling oneself an empath, when that is not the case. Some may find it appalling, spiteful, arrogant and just plain mean. That is not in any way my intention, but I can understand the perception. 

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All empath tests are designed to tell you that you are an empath. All of them! They do not take into consideration, that you are a human being with normal human empathy. So, there are a lot of people out there, who thinks they are empaths, even when they are not.

It is a tendency, that worries me a great deal. As much as I would like to give people some peace in mind, an understanding smile and a bit of needed comfort, it would only make things worse. This is my theory…

A clairvoyant is in wide terms a person who can communicate with spirits. Originally the description was more specifically to ‘see’ spirits, but today this definition covers most aspects of this contact. And I believe it makes things easier to understand. For the clairvoyant, I guess it makes little difference, whether the impressions are heard, seen, smelled or felt, as long as it is working and they know how to distinguish.

When it comes to empaths, it does make a difference where the inputs come from. We are dealing with feelings here, and so to assume that some feelings aren’t your own is quite dangerous, if they actually are. It may not be a life threatening danger, but psychologically it is not healthy. This stands in contrast to the usually debated problem, where we think a feeling is our own, when in fact it is someone else’s.

I have come to realize, that my own definition of what an empath is, is not the general definition. So I face the challenge of either accepting the general term, fight it or create my own. I am going to fight it, because I believe there is much need for clarity on several levels. It is not just my personal problem with the definition being so wide it covers all of humanity, it is also because the current idea that everyone is an empath has problematic consequences.

As empaths we have the risk of screwing up our emotional life by perceiving feelings within to come from a wrong source. Both the ones that are our own, and the ones that are not. The ability to distinguish is essential. But a person who thinks he/she is an empath, when that is not the case, will suffer unnecessary consequences just by believing it. I find that very unfortunate.

But you can be a non-empath and still feel other peoples feelings as your own! 

It has to do with mirror neurons, and it is the same principle as when you look at someone eating a pickle, and soon your mouth starts to run. Our brain responds to the visual impressions of others as if we did it ourselves. For a scientific reference, read more about it here…

Maybe you are thinking: “But, if we feel other peoples emotions either way, the solution must be the same, right?” And technically you would be right. At least if we do not take the element of control into this. The empath ability can be controlled. You can read more about that here, but in short it is a matter of tuning in on the things we find relevant. So the control is about figuring out, what is relevant to you.

The impressions we get through mirror neurons can be controlled as well, but it is a very different method you have to use.

I have a theory (and I am working on backing it up), that even the mirror neurons can be controlled in the ways of perception. If a non-empath thinks he is overwhelmed by impressions, and he goes out in public, he will be overwhelmed by impressions. The brain is set on “receive inputs” and the mind just takes it all in and allows him to interpret everything he sees.

So, the inputs he gets are basically the ones that are visible. The difference is, that his perception makes the brain interpret the inputs through the body, causing him to actually feel the feelings that are being expressed visually from others. That makes the perception the key problem for him. 

And I do believe, that a lot of people who calls themselves empaths without being so, are causing themselves a lot of problems just by perceiving it this way. If I tell myself I can’t run fast, then I never will, the mind follows the perception and affects the body. 

So we are back to the same problem, just defined slightly differently. What is the bloody difference!!??

Empaths do not need to see people in order to get the impressions. That is the primary difference. An empathetic non-empath who thinks he is an empath still needs to see the people he gets impressions from. That is important to note. A non-empath who doesn’t perceive himself to be an empath, will also get these impressions, but since the mind has not been set on “feel this!”, he will not experience the inputs the same way. 

I guess I need to illustrate it:

3 people are sitting in a room. The first is an empath, the two others are not, but one of them thinks he is. Another person comes in, looks a little sad but doesn’t say anything. The empath notice the sadness but doesn’t want to tune in on it, so nothing happens here. The two others sees the same, but of all three only the person who believes himself to be an empath begins to feel sad as well. 

It is the work of the mirror neurons. He feels sad, because what he is telling himself subconsciously and consciously is: “I feel what I see!” and so he does.

Calling oneself an empath, when that is not the case, creates these situations, and they are completely unnecessary. It is also an evil spiral to go down, because how can you convince yourself that you are not an empath, when you actually do feel peoples emotions as your own?

Despite the pain and agony, it is still appealing somehow. There is a reason this person chose to call himself an empath to begin with, and if that is not resolved, then it will be impossible for him to wrist himself out of it.

That is my theory, fairly depressing I guess…

I feel the need to fight the idea that everyone can call themselves an empath. I feel the need to put some specific criteria to the definition, simply to avoid non-empaths falling into this trap, as I see it. Empaths too risk the exact same thing! But non-empaths do not have to, and that is the point!

I know this post is appalling to most people, but I really feel I have to write it.